We went trick or treating. The kids got way more than they would ever be allowed to eat and Josh and I aren't partaking, so we are going to donate most of it... I struggle with wanting to trash it but it seems wasteful. It really is junk no one should be eating.. but it is what it is.
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| The loot |
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| Quality control |
We had Emotera Photography do our family photos this year. Jacky was wonderful! She was very professional, she listened to our wants and we discussed our past photo shoot annoyances. She guided us into great shots. Nothing looked too staged. They were mostly action shots, like I really wanted. Below is a selfie I took during the shoot (while she was focusing on the kids)!
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| Loving life |
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| My delicious Vegan French Onion Soup |
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Family's normal version
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I mentioned in the last post that I would be starting a running group, well, I did it!. Our first meetup is next week.
I have been CRAVING sweets SOOOOO bad. It is like worse than it's ever been. I am obsessing over them. I'm wondering why... Am I having some sort of imbalance? Am I just addicted? I have been debating doing another cleanse because if you remember I stopped having cravings for sweets and didn't even want them for a while after... The thought makes me shudder though. It was so hard emotionally.
I got the green light at work to have my surgery. I am going to go for a consult and see what the Dr. thinks. Hopefully I won't have much downtime and we can fix everything in one swoop.
My BMs continue to be a source of annoyance. I am hopeful that after surgery I won't be having such issues. We shall see.
I have been slacking on the water intake the past couple of days. I know it's because I don't have a water bottle again. I need to pick one up. UPDATE: I picked one up so that should help me drink more!
My body is swollen! I don't know why... I guess it could be because of my urogyno issue. For a while now, I've had to wedding rings on my pointer finger. The other night I went to bed and woke up with them stuck and my finger was, bright red.
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| After I got my engagement ring off |
My pants are feeling snug (my top still feels small). My weight has been 116-120.. Perhaps it's all of the delicious baked goods I have been making and greedily consuming without offering any to the family? It feels like I have been eating more grains and less veggies lately. I have noticed that before, I was so hungry I needed to eat 6 to 7 times a day. Now, I am either forcing myself to eat 3-5 time and I am continuing to eat until I feel sick! I think my portions have gotten bigger too? It seems like it is taking longer to feel full or when I feel full it tastes so good I just keep eating... Perhaps I have stretched my stomach out again? Redoing that cleanse is looking more and more appealing.
I probably should start using the myfitnesspal app again. I thought if I didn't focus so much time and energy on my calories I would be happier but that's not the case. People have been hounding me about how thin they think I look and how I shouldn't be worrying so much and blah blah blah... I know they mean well... that is why I decided to try letting go. Well what matters the most is my happiness (and my family's) so I need to focus more on that again and not on what others think. I also need to get back in the gym with the trainer and get the P90X going again. I think the running group should help too. Just gotta make sure I am getting up on time.
That is another thing, I have been tired. I am not talking about normal tired. I mean EXHAUSTED. I am waking up a few times a night (very odd for me) and it feels like I could get up at any one of those for the day but I don't because it is still dark and I have only been asleep for 2-5 hours... but by the time 6-8 hours have passed I do not want to get up anymore. I've been sleeping through my alarm and my husband's. When I finally drag myself out of bed, it's 45-15 minutes before I need to leave!
Well, tomorrow is a new day, right? I should just be thankful for my loving family, clothes (although they don't fit right), delicious food and shelter.